As much as I tried to focus on work today, it was merely impossible. I could not stop thinking of the conversation I had with my friend yesterday during dinner. Her son is twenty one years old. He dropped school without giving her a proper explanation and he has no intention of doing anything. He just stays home and watches TV. She fears that he might be depressed. She would like to help him somehow, but she does not know how, or where to begin.
He refuses to talk with her about dropping college. He has shown no interest in looking for a job, or starting to provide for him. At his age, most of his friends are either in college or having a job.
While my friend was describing me how difficult it is for her to see him doing nothing, I suggested to her to stop doing things for him. If he was home doing literally nothing, he had to help somehow. He wasn’t a baby anymore! He had to understand, or to be reminded that everyone had responsibilities and that nothing came for free.
On my opinion, he was taking for granted his mom and all the efforts she was doing for him. He had to change and start being more involved in the house chores. I asked my friend to let him cook, do the dishes, the laundry, clean the house, etc.
Then if he would not agree to this, he had to go look for a job. I even mentioned that my husband’s company was hiring, in case he was interesting in learning a new skill. The company was doing Drain Inspection Toronto and they had two entry-level positions. I did not know much about the pay or the benefits offered, or if there were any. In case he was interested, I could have put him in contact with my husband, and he would give him all the details.
I felt bad for my friend, seeing her worrying for kid. I personally don’t think he was going through any depression. I believe he was just bored of everything. Since he was a child, he had everything offered to him on a silver tray. His parents never let him cry for anything. Whenever he said he wanted something, they rushed and bought it, without questioning if it was really helpful. It’s bad parenting, I tell you! Thus the spoiled kid turned into a young man with no real goals or values.